Boy Oh Boyers

We drive down to south Georgia to see Grammies in the hospital. Even though Rowan didn't meet the minimum age of 12 to visit, we brought him in with the blessing of the charge nurse. As soon as we came into the room, we put Rowan on the floor to walk (holding our fingers), and he and Grammies carried on a spunky and joyful conversation. It consisted of Rowan squealing, "Eeee!", and Grammies squawking "Aaaah!" They wore each other out with the frolicking. We returned the next day and visited more, this time Rowan sat on the bed next to Grammies and turned her tissue box over and over. Rowan pulled out one tissue, and I said "Ok, one is enough." Grammies said, "No, Rowan, go ahead and pull out more," and she proceeded to yank, yank, yank more tissues and give him a hand full. When I complained that she had undermined my parental authority, she calmly explained "The Great-Grandmother can undermine anything she wants."

The next day, Grammies was doing much worse, so we did not bring Rowan. After spending the day in her hospital room, I kissed her on the forehead and told her I was leaving and that I'd be back tomorrow. I said "I love you, Grammies." She said, "I love you too, Babe." Those were the last words my grandmother and I said to each other. She worsened, went to sleep, and passed away Tuesday night.

Rowan's great-grandmother and I have spent a lifetime saying words to each other. We talked about everything. We knew each other's opinions on things that mattered and many things that didn't. We corrected each other, scolded each other, supported each other, and enjoyed each other. We filled a void in each other's hearts, and perhaps equally large a void in each other's daily routines. I called her every day except when I absolutely couldn't (like when I was out of the country or when she was in the intensive care unit.) Besides Tom, Grammies was my single closest friend. Don't ask me how we got that way; it's been true since I was old enough to converse with her. As a grandmother she was free from the need to discipline and correct me, and I was free from the need to look cool or save face in front of her like I did with my other friends because no matter what I did Grammies would be impressed with me.

Rowan won't remember being in Grammies' hospital room that day, except what he's told. He won't remember the time she flew up, just a few months ago, to North Carolina to see him and the fact that all she could think about for weeks before that was planting a big, loud grandmother kiss on his cheek. But through knowing me, Rowan will know some parts of his great-grandmother. Hopefully they'll be the best parts: the unwaivering love, the selfless generosity, the sure sense of right and wrong, the courage and determination. Sometimes I know he'll see the bad parts, too: the stubbornness or the over-abundance of opinions even on trivial things. But he'll see her, I know he will. People always say one generation carries on the life of the previous, and that's how life works. I embrace that. I love you, Grammies. Let's keep living.

Sorry there was a lag in pictures of the day. One has been posted for today, and hopefully we won't miss any more for a while. The unexpected travel plus heavy work schedule to catch up just had me out of pocket.

In light of recent events, a very important development has occurred that I haven't mentioned yet. Rowan has decided that he is through breastfeeding, and would simply prefer a bottle from now on, thank you very much. He still wants the breastmilk, make no mistake -- he just demands a mode of delivery that is more mobile that Mommy's breast. Here's how it went down.

About two weeks ago Rowan started not wanting to nurse. He'd resist when I tried to lie him down, and he'd pop off over and over whenever anything interesting happened in the room. He'd chomp down when he was through eating, and often got too impatient to nurse on both sides. My milk supply was abundant as usual, so it became clear this was a new issue Rowan had with breastfeeding: he does not want to lie down, and he does not want to be still! Last week while we were in Georgia, the problem progressed to the point that the moment I tried to lie Rowan back to feed him, he would cry and stiffen his whole body. If I did manage to get him into position, he would reward my efforts with a swift chomp to the nipple! It only took a couple of tries like that, and we decided to cut our losses. (By the way, each of those times, Rowan hungrily took a bottle full of breastmilk immediately after the failed nursing attempt -- so the problem was not that he wasn't hungry.) Bottle feeding addresses the concerns Rowan has so civilizedly expressed: he can sit up, he can look around because the bottle moves with him, and the milk flows a little faster from a bottle than the breast.

So the big news is that Rowan has switched to exclusively bottle feeding now. I'm gradually reducing the frequency with which I pump breastmilk, and my supply will naturally taper off. We'll use up the stores of frozen breastmilk from the freezer, slowly increasing the proportion of formula to breastmilk in Rowan's bottles. He's only got a few months until the pediatricians say we should switch him to whole milk anyway.

I'll say I am terribly grateful for the precious, trouble-free time of breastfeeding we did have. My goal was to breastfeed for the first year, but a solid nine months of exclusive breastfeeding is still more than most babies I know...and they turn out marvelously! Apparently mine is well on his way to asserting himself when he wants something. :-)

It's awful, I know, but I can't help thinking when these teeth come in, there will be Bugs Bunny jokes galore! Of course our darling will be just as handsome as ever to us.

The nine-month checkup last Wednesday was a breeze. No shots!

Rowan weighed 21 pounds (55th percentile), was 29 1/4 inches long (80th percentile), and his head was 18 inches in circumference (55th percentile). It was a far more playful visit than past ones had been. We timed it just right between feeding times and nap times!

The doctor said it's fine to broaden the food horizon whenever we want. So, you may also be interested to know that on a Saturday afternoon outing just today, Rowan got his first taste of spaghetti! We gave him some little sections of noodle with minimal sauce. Besides the trouble he had picking them up (slippery little things!), he seemed to quite enjoy them. Our planned Babies 'R Us stop saw one additional item: a bib with sleeves for future spaghetti adventures!

Just when I have captured a picture of the two new top teeth, would you believe there are now three new top teeth? Yep! The two front top teeth are continuing to come in, and now on the left (Rowan's left) the next tooth is visible too. This picture from a couple of days ago is from a funny angle because I was lying on the floor while Rowan was standing, but it definitely shows you the two top teeth!

Around here, things change quickly!